Did you get a new gadget for Christmas this year? As we made our rounds to the year-end parties and get-togethers, it seems many people were again excited about their new technology devices. Even my most technology-challenged business partner (I’m not referring to Dr. Dave) finally got an iPhone for Christmas (although he hasn’t taken it out of the box yet)!
New toys usually lead to more digital consumption–or at least a commitment to make use of the new technology. Before you jump in with both feet and start texting your kids at the dinner table, I thought I’d pass on a new year's resolution that the CEO of a prominent technology venture capital firm recently made:
“Focus on the live conversations at hand rather than parallel conversations on the screens.”
This resolution was made by Tony Tjan, the CEO, Managing Partner, and Founder of the venture capital firm Cue Ball.
Tjan made this resolution because he’s noticed a rising and unproductive trend toward people trying to perform digital conflict resolution. The de facto path for issue resolution seems to be increasingly via email.
More accurately, email has become a convenient mechanism for issue-avoidance. It is easier, quicker, less stressful, and less confrontational to have critical or challenging issues sent over email versus a live one-on-one with a counterpart.
If you have responsibility for coaching those on your team, or managing a pipeline of candidates as a hiring manger, this tendency can be particularly problematic. Why? Because you’re giving up one of your most useful and effective tools—the live conversation.
Tjan goes on to describe how email and texts are inferior to live conversations:
1. It is hard to get the EQ (emotional intelligence) right in email. The biggest drawback and danger with email is that the tone and context are easy to misread. In a live conversation, how one says something, with modulations and intonations, is as important as what they are saying. With email, it is hard to get the feelings behind the words.
2. Email and text often promote reactive responses, as opposed to progress and action to move forward. Going back to the zero latency expectation in digital communications… it is hard for people to pause and think about what they should say. One of my colleagues suggests not reacting to any incendiary message until you have at least had a night to sleep on it, and always trying to take the higher ground over email.
3. Email prolongs debate. Because of the two reasons above, I have seen too many debates continue well beyond the point of usefulness. Worse, I have experienced situations which start relatively benignly over email, only to escalate because intentions and interests are easily misunderstood online. When I ask people if they have called or asked to meet the counterpart to try and reach a resolution, there is usually a pause, then a sad answer of "no."
While you may be excited about your new device, and everyone is encouraging you to become more digital in your communication, do something counterintuitive: pick up the phone and increase the number of live conversations you have this year.
Editor's Note: This article was written by Ben Hess. Ben is the Founding Partner and Managing Director of Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.
