Ben’s article opens the door to possibly an entire series of articles.  You see, if we don’t understand both the causes and the impact of happiness, we really can’t have any influence over anyone.  We must appeal to what really makes people happy to engage them on any meaningful level.

All science around human flourishing can be summed up in one sentence: “It turns out that we are very poor predictors of what makes us happy.”  (Seligman, Csikszentmihalyi, and Diener all say in separate writings)

Why are we such poor predictors of what makes us happy?  Basically, it’s because we get sidetracked by the ever increasing availability and temptation of short-cuts and instant gratification.  Additionally, volumes of evidence suggests that for the last 60 years we have been told (from teachers, parents, media, friends, and public policy) that happiness is attained by those who increase their pleasurable experiences in both frequency and duration. 

Science, however, tells a different story…  Research shows that this mentality (the belief that we need to do more fun things in life to be happy) leads to an increase in societal and personal depression and anxiety.

Science has found that…ouch, here comes the bad news.. happiness takes work!  It takes character development, delayed gratification, engagement in ones work, strong marriage (this has the highest correlation to happiness), playing an active role in developing ones children, and having goals that are built upon deep beliefs and purpose.

Increasing happiness in ourselves and in others undoubtedly takes work.  But, if your responsibilities include coaching others, the knowledge is invaluable.  You can begin to ask:

1. Are you happy?
2. Let’s figure out why or why not? (If I can’t help your overall happiness quotient, what’s keeping you from moving to another office?
3. What do you believe will make you happy here?
4. How are your goals in this job related to your overall goals in life? 

Side Note:  If the person only focuses on the financial picture, ask them:  How does this fit into your goals for your family, community, or faith?  If your approach strikes them as new and different, let them know that you are dedicated to helping them see the whole picture.  You want them to work hard, but it has to be toward something with more meaning than money (…although this is certainly part of the picture and not at all bad in itself!).

Here is an example of a work-related goal you may elicit:  “I want to be good at what I do, and service my clients better than they have ever been serviced…”  Now that’s a goal!  But, again, it takes hard work.  When they succeed, they’ll feel deeply satisfied and very grateful to you. 

It will take time, planning, execution, and effort, because remember…there are no shortcuts to happiness!