WorkPuzzle

7 Dating Tips from Dr. Dave (That Will Also Help You Be a Better Hiring Manager)

I’m not sure whether this discussion will help you more with your dating life or your potential success as a recruiter.  Since Dr. Phil seems to have a lock on all the sensational topics, I’ll continue to focus on the business side of psychology.  
 
Building a pipeline of talented people who are resilient and like to work hard is no easy task. We make it far more difficult when we forget the simple rules of interpersonal etiquette.  

A good analogy to appropriate expectations when recruiting is to remember the common dos and don’ts of dating (to make this read easier, I’m going to use female pronouns, since I’m a guy)

1. Get the guts to ask. Few people ever get married without first getting up the courage to ask someone out. This is also true in recruiting. Your first and only goal initially should be to get together for a brief time.
2. Ask about her. Don’t drone on and on about you. How many of you like to hear your date drone on and on about themselves without wanting to know anything about you? This is a bad sign. She’ll quickly know that you desire the relationship for your own purposes and care very little about meeting her needs.
3. Know your competition, but don’t put them down. There is nothing wrong with being confident about what you can offer, but be careful in being negative about the competition. If you began to slander your date’s friends, she will probably be disgusted by your lack of character and drop you like a rock. You can’t repel and attract at the same time.
4. Get the next date- but don’t ask her to get married. You would never dream of scaring your first date with an offer to tie the knot. She would freak out and never see you again! Move slowly with a constant assessment of where she is in the process of relationship building and proceed accordingly.
5. When you sense you know that you can meet her needs, ask for the commitment. There is a time and place to ask for the person to come on board and challenge them to do what is necessary to make the commitment, i.e. “forsaking all others”. Don’t chicken-out here. If she says no, you can still continue to date.
6. DO remember that, unlike dating (for most people), you can date several people at the same time. By having a way to track your full pipeline of prospects, you don’t have to feel terribly disappointed by any one reaction. Always have plenty of people who represent the entire “dating” process from first date to close.
   
7. Never treat people as objects. Treating people like objects is never a good idea. People have a sixth sense about this. If you’re dating a person who is fairly desperate for a relationship, she might put up with this for a while. But sooner or later, she’ll leave. Most people can sense that you have no interest in them beyond what they are generating for you and your organization.

By having a way to track your full pipeline of prospects, you don’t have to feel terribly disappointed by any one reaction. Always have plenty of people who represent the entire “dating” process from first date to close.

If you’re struggling with these concepts, you may need to do some remedial work to reset your framework for these types of interactions.

The first step it to examine yourself. Do you treat those who work in your organization with little regard for who they are as individuals? Or, do those around you know that you’re interested in their growth for their sake and the sake of the company?  If you’re unsure, ask a few people who you can trust to give you an honest answer. If you do have this tendency there is always a very simple rule of thumb to apply in every interaction. “How would I like to be treated if I were in the other person’s shoes?”

The second step is to consider whether you’re patient.   Remember that “impatience” is the fruit of pride. We want others to be patient with us.  We want others to be interested in our strengths and how we use them daily.  We want others to be curious about us as people who have lives outside of the office. It only makes sense to extend these courtesies to those around us.

If you want to build an environment of attachment and performance, you need to seriously consider how to shape your own strengths around the above solution. The real trick is keeping it up after the dating and during the marriage.

A Compulsion to Fix Things

This past weekend I was reminded of how I am cursed with a need to fix things.  This is a shame because I really don’t have the training to do so.

I’m not talking about psychology here;  I’m talking about things…household things.  For instance, during the first 18 years of my marriage I kept a clothes dryer “alive” that had been given to us when my wife and I were first married.  And, when it was given to us, it was already ten years old!

My initial commitment to a yearly ritual of reviving this old clothes dryer began with the poverty-driven need I had in graduate school to save cost or starve.  Out of desperation, I would extract broken parts and take them into the appliance parts supply store.   It was common for the counter guy to invite the entire staff out for a good laugh and history lesson about “the days when all parts were steel like this one.”

My compulsion continued long after it would have been less time consuming, more energy efficient, and well within my financial capabilities to replace the monster.   But, I was not to be defeated.  I simply had to fix it.

This past weekend my water heater began leaking. My wife and I actually had a fight over this ridiculous compulsion of mine to prove that “I’ve still got it”.  And, of course, the need to save a few bucks.

It took all of Saturday to do the research and all of Sunday to install it.  Around the Mashburn house that evening you could hear things coming out of my mouth like, “We’ve got hot water”, or ”Try taking a bath”.  It was like I had done something powerful and magic.  I think I felt manlier.

What does this have to do with recruiting, coaching or personal performance you ask?  Does this somehow apply to the subject matter of this blog?  I have no idea.  Maybe someone smarter and more creative could come up with some compelling esoteric description of how this could help you, but not me.  I was too focused on conquering my water heater over the weekend!

Resilience Revisited: Avoiding Anxiety Paralysis

Before the holidays, we wrote a couple of articles on resilience.   The articles highlighted the research of Dr. Salvatore Maddi and summarized the principles that he discovered.

Last week, Business Week did an article on resilience as well.  In today’s economic climate, it’s a topic that interests a lot of us.   Like the bathroom plunger under the sink, I don’t care for the circumstances that require me put the tool into use, but I am glad I have it.

Dr. Kerry Sulkowicz makes it clear you’re going to need resilience if you’re going to maintain a clear head during  tough times:

“Many psychologists consider [resilience] a key component of emotional health. Resilient people, they have observed, are naturally better at containing their anxiety. And that enables them to see in hardship the seeds of opportunity. What would emotional resilience entail in the face of the current crisis? The ability to resist being swept up in the global state of panic and to adapt as creatively as possible to one's setbacks and losses.”

We see this principle played out with our clients every day.  Some people are not very good at containing their anxiety and they become paralyzed as a result.  But, others are busy working to find new opportunities.  We all feel the strain, but some people have figured out how to use that strain as a catalyst for action.

If you find yourself in the second group, Dr. Sulkowicz has some advice for you:

“But just as there is no shortcut to emotional health, you can't become resilient overnight, or by sheer will, or by reading the latest book on the subject. Instead, resilience is acquired through increasing self-awareness. You must connect with trusted and candid intimates who help you build confidence. You need to repeatedly expose yourself to a range of difficult circumstances and then overcome them.”

If you’re responsible for coaching those around you, this is a great opportunity.  You’re the “trusted and candid intimate” your protégés need to overcome their anxiety.  Can you help them identify the things they are already overcoming?  This is the foundation to build upon and can give them courage to take on the next challenge.

If you’re struggling yourself, then you need to connect with others who can provide you support.  The first tendency will be to just talk with those who will compassionately identify with our circumstances.  While this may help, we also need those “tough love” friends who can give us the push to take on the next challenge.

Editor’s Note:  Did you miss the previous articles on resilience?  Click on the following links to catch up:  

Resilience: Are You Able to Thrive Under Stressful Conditions?

Resilience: Are You Able to Thrive Under Stressful Conditions? Part 2

The Stars Might Lie, but the Numbers Never Do

Yesterday, I told you I would follow-up with an example of how using metrics has equipped us to save our clients a significant amount of money on candidate advertising.

A few months back, we were interested in buying advertising in a metro area where we had a major client.   The client needed to source more than 500 candidates per month to meet its hiring goals.  In  this metro area, there is a regional job board that is very prominent—you see its ads on the sides of buses, at bus stops, on trains, and you hear its ads on the radio.  It constantly refers to itself as the #1 job board in this metro area.

We inquired about advertising on this company’s job board.  The prices were high, but its claims of traffic to the site were high as well.   Since we had been advertising in this city for more than a year, we had reliable metrics on this vendor’s competitors “advertising cost per applicant.”

With these competitive metrics in hand, we were able to negotiate a one-month trial at a fairly low price.   The trial pricing was based on a one-year commitment assuming the job board was able to hit a cost per applicant benchmark that its competitors were meeting.  

As you probably guessed, the trial did not meet the expectations of either party.  To this day, we’re able to source candidates in this marketplace through a group of competitive job boards and search strategies at an advertising cost of $3/candidate.  The trial with the prospective vendor produced a cost of $15/candidate.   Working this backwards, a job posting on this company’s job board priced at $300/month was really only worth $60/month for our application.  

With this information (a metric that can be used across vendors, reliable data from a vendor’s competitors, and low-cost trial data from the new vendor), we were in a much better position to understand the true reality of the situation.   In the subsequent negotiation, we were able to get this vendor to quickly reduce its prices by more than 50%.   It still ended in an impasse because the vendor was not willing to lower its price enough to displace its competitors, but you do have to feel sorry for all the companies paying $300 per posting!  With just a little more information and the confidence to ask, they could be paying $150 for the same advertisement.

If you apply this principle across the thousands of candidate advertising impressions we provide our clients on a daily basis, it adds up to some significant savings.  Granted, it cost us money to define, develop systems, and track this data, but the numbers do pay off.

I hope you’ll find an application in your business where you can use metrics to save you money or find opportunities that you’re missing.  It reminds me of the theme of one of my favorite Mary Chapin Carpenter songs, “The stars might lie, but the numbers never do.”

There's Gold in Them There Metrics!

I wanted to follow-up on Dave’s discussion yesterday by demonstrating how the principle of measurement has worked in our business.

As many of you know, I’m the Managing Director of Tidemark.  Tidemark is a recruitment process outsourcing company that specializes in sourcing large numbers of candidates for high volume hiring applications.  In simple terms, we’re hired to help companies develop a consistent and predictable flow of candidates.

We use many different tools to accomplish this task for a company, and we find that each application needs customization to produce the best results.  However, one tool we commonly use is the traditional job board. 

There are more than 40,000 job boards on the internet today.  The general business model for a job board is to charge a fee to “list” a job on their website.    Successful job boards drive a lot of traffic to their sites, and the jobs on the high-traffic sites get viewed by more potential candidates.  Theoretically, the price of a job posting on a particular site is related to the traffic a job board can garner.   Higher traffic—higher cost per job.

But, reality does not always match the theory.  In a business arena where it is difficult to measure and verify common metrics such as internet traffic, it is to our advantage to dig deeper.  We advertise very specific jobs in very specific industries.  We have an interest in what kind of traffic can be generated to our specific jobs.  We also have an interest in knowing how many people viewing our jobs actually turn into applicants.

Although there are a number of other factors that cause results, we eventually boil down this process (from a job board perspective) to a single metric:  “advertising cost per applicant.”  With this metric we now have a negotiating platform that is based on solid data and reality—our reality.

Over time, we’ve been able to collect data from more than 20 metropolitan areas and track issues such as seasonality, changes in the job market in the industries where we source, and even revenue flowing into our client’s industries.   But, everything still filters down to the “advertising cost per applicant” metric.

With this metric in hand, we’re able to cut through the sales and marketing rhetoric offered by a job board as a way to justifying pricing.   We question the job board on a very specific issue:  can the job board produce enough candidates to support the price that they are suggesting we pay?  If their competitors can produce results at a certain “cost per applicant” for our application, doesn’t  it make sense that this vendor should be able to meet the same metric?  If they can’t meet this standard, they need to lower their prices to meet their competitors—that only makes sense.

In this process, we’re not trying to disparage the vendor; we’re just helping both sides to see the true value of the service for our unique application.  Through this process, we’ve saved our clients tens of thousands of dollars in advertising expenses.  Tomorrow, I’ll share a specific example of how a negotiation was done with a particular vendor.  It will help clarify the concept if I run through an example.

Of course, most of you are not in the recruitment process outsourcing business, so what worked in our business will not directly apply to what you’re doing.  But, don’t miss the principle:

Every business process has points of measurement that can be identified and then optimized. 

What are the measurement points in your business?  If nothing comes to mind, that’s a red flag!   If you do have measurement points identified, are they the right ones?   In some cases, metrics are overcome by events and need to be adjusted to match a new reality.  It may be worth the time to take an inventory of one your business processes and see what can and needs to be measured.

6 Reasons Professionals Measure Performance

If you spend any time watching sports on a professional level, you’re keenly aware that the biggest difference between pro and recreational teams (outside of talent) is that they measure everything. And I do mean everything!   Why?  Professionals know that without measurement there is no way for them to assess and predict performance of a team or an individual.

Without exception, measuring systems exists in every sport. But let’s take baseball as an example.  Here are some of the things baseball professionals measure:

 
On-Base Percentage (OBS):  the number of times a player reaches base divided by total plate appearances.

Batting Average (BA):  the number of hits a player gets divided by “at bats.”

Slugging Percentage (SLG):  the number of total bases divided by “at bats.”   This is a little more difficult to explain—there is a formula for this if you care to research it more.

Earned Run Average (ERA):  approximately the number of runs allowed per nine innings.

Strikeouts Per Nine Innings (K/9i),  Strikeouts per Walk (K/BB), Walks plus Hits per Innings Pitched (WHIP), Opponent On-Base plus Slugging  Percentage (OOPS), etc.

Here is my favorite:  SLOB (Slugging % x On-Base %).   Or course this has a double meaning—it is said to also describe those who sit around and think about baseball statistics!

There are at least 90 commonly used statistics (and yes, they all have acronyms) in baseball.  This may all sound a bit ridiculous, but exceptionally talented and deeply competitive baseball professionals enjoy this level of scrutiny. It compels them to practice, find patterns, find weaknesses and improve. 

Here are the top 6 reasons that professionals depend upon measurement:

1. They can’t set goals without it.
2. They can’t measure progress without it.
3. They can’t forecast results without it.
4. They can’t compare performance without it.
5. They can’t assess changes and fix problems without it.
6. They certainly can’t beat the competition without it.

Let me ask you a question, and I encourage to answer honestly:  Do you approach your work as a professional or as an amateur?  

Professionals measure, and amateurs typically “fly by the seat of their pants.”   

5 Things We Can Learn From Great Managers in Peru

Over the past year, I have had the pleasure of becoming friends with a group of people who have developed a large real estate construction and management company in Lima, Peru.   What brought this to mind today was that they happen to be in-country this week.

I recently traveled to Peru myself as part of this project.   On this trip, I was able to witness firsthand the spirit of work among the people there.  More specifically, I was able to gain exposure to a group of companies that seemed to possess an unlimited sense of hope and rejuvenation.

The country of Peru has an interesting economic history.  Like many Latin America countries in the ‘70s and ‘80s, it was plagued with numerous economic problems such as high inflation, narcotics trading, corruption, failed government initiatives, etc. 

In the mid-‘90s, Peru underwent considerable free-market economic reforms that produced significant economic growth, spurred foreign investment, and brought inflation under control.   For an economy that was once primarily based on agriculture and the mining of natural resources, a transition has occurred to where more than 70% of their GDP is now derived from the services.

For those people who grew up in Peru during very difficult and near hopeless economic conditions, the new economy is perceived as their best chance to accomplish something significant.  During my time as a business professional, I have rarely witnessed as much talent voluntarily working long hours towards a mutual goal.

But, it went a little deeper.  Many of these people saw their work as a way to tap the very best of who they are.  Their management teams recognized this energy and made it part of their organizations. 
Here are some specific things I noticed about their managers: 

1. They expect their organizations to hire the best talent. They settle for nothing but the best.
2. They expect these talented people to set the bar high and be fully engaged in their work.
3. They measure everything and everyone.   The managers made it clear that without reliable data you can’t set meaningful goals and assess daily progress.
4. They are constantly trying to discover what their clients want.
5. Most importantly, they have the courage to be constantly active. They don’t get stuck in inactivity, which many organizations and people tend to do.

I was inspired, and I wish that more organizations in our country could tap into these principles.  While the financial results were impressive among these companies, the positive energy and passion is what caught my attention the most.

Will This Be a "Happy" New Year for You? Part 3

I hope that some of you have begun the process of identifying and pursuing your “ideal self.”  If you want to improve the way you recruit, coach, or manage those around you, it’s imperative that you do so.

As the owner of one large company aptly said,

“Continued learning and personal growth are essential for the evolution of a world-class leader.”

If you drag your feet and ignore this powerful exercise, you’ll miss a chance to improve your level of overall well-being in the upcoming year.

Some people resist these types of exercises because it makes them feel like they are admitting weakness or inwardly confessing that something is wrong with them.  The opposite is true.   Working on these issues is really an admission that you want to improve and that you have an “ideal self” waiting to be activated.   

My background is in Clinical Psychology. I continue to see clients in my private practice 2 days a week. Over the course of the last 21 years, I’ve logged well over 30,000 hours of psychotherapy with people having a range of difficulties. Regardless of the presenting problem, at the heart of each person’s transformation is the struggle to shed the “false self” (see my previous blog) and to pursue alignment between the individual’s ‘real self” and their “ideal self.”  

People undergoing psychotherapy build up layers of protection that make it very difficult for them to identify their “ideal self”.  These layers of protection are the result of adversity, trauma, or some other significant set of circumstances.   For these people, this process can be very long and painful.  But, it is rewarding.  I’ve consistently seen it free people to do things they could never have dreamed of doing before this transformation.

Let me give you an example.  Several years ago, a woman came to see me who had lived a life that resembles most of our nightmares. Her parents rented her out for child pornography films and threatened her life on several occasions when she resisted. As an adult, she had shown little respect for herself and was involved a several very abusive relationships.  Despite having an incredibly high IQ and natural artistic talent, she was working as a housekeeper when she started psychotherapy.

After several years of therapy, she began to sell her art work, discontinued all her abusive relationships, and began to form friendships with people who she had always believed were “better” than her. With continued growth, she later envisioned, developed, and is now operating a vocational school in Uganda.  This school is for individuals who have themselves lived lives of horror.  The purpose of this school is to equip these individuals to achieve what they didn’t think possible and work towards a decent living.

Of course, most people like you and me do not have to fight against such devastating circumstances, nor do we need the help of a psychologist to guide us through the process of identifying our “ideal self.” 

But, don’t lose the principle just because the scale of issue may be smaller in your own life.  Food is necessary to nurse a very sick person back to health, but it is also required for normal people to maintain themselves.   I’ve applied this process in my own life, and I've seen it produce changes in the lives of those around me.    Hopefully, you’ll give it a try as well.

Note:  New to Workpuzzle?  Read Part 1 and Part 2 on this topic to learn the process of identifying your “ideal self.”

Will This Be a "Happy" New Year for You? Part 2

How does a person go about identifying their “ideal self”?  Some people have an idea of what kind of person they want to become—this vision just needs to be brought into focus.  Others haven’t really given this concept very much conscious thought.

Even if you’re in the second group, perceiving what your ideal self will be is not as difficult as it may sound.  Subconsciously, each of us is haunted by conflicts around this ideal, and your mind is constantly trying to reconcile these conflicts.  Tapping into the work that your mind has already done shortcuts the progression necessary to identify the ideal self.   

The following is a process that I have personally used to measure my progress toward living aligned to my ideal self. It may seem complicated at first, but it gets clearer as you begin to work on it yourself.  

First I try to assess how closely I can align my real self (who I am in both strengths and character) with my ideal self (the self that I want to become).  To make this assessment, I need to know the following things:

1. What character traits, virtues and actions I want to display (my ideal self).
2. What strengths and expertise I bring to the table (my real self).
3. What characteristics I currently display that  are self-centered (thus interfering with alignment).

Sit down with a notepad and pen and do the following: 

Write down a description (characteristics, behavior, values) of your best self. These would be  those characteristics that people love about you, and are part your natural makeup. The best self is the alignment of your ideal self and real self.

Next, write down characteristics of your worst self (behaviors, values etc). These are the characteristics that people generally dislike about you and usually are rooted in dark values such as selfishness, need for admiration or superiority, excessive need for safety and security, etc.

Finally write down what is your “ought self.” These are those behaviors that seem like they are good and decent but feel forced, unnatural, and more of a burden. These traits keep you from being real. Sometimes, those whom you trust are better able to recognize these behaviors than you are. Ask them if they can share with you ways in which you burn unnecessary energy trying to be someone you believe you’re supposed to be. 

Once these are written out, condense them into a list that you can write on a small piece of paper that will fit in your wallet or purse. Throughout the year, frequently use idle time to review how you’re doing. Ask yourself, which self am I living today? Is it making me and others around me happy? How can I get myself back on track?

If you do the above, I can’t guarantee that your business will pick up. But I can guarantee that you and those you influence will feel better about you and you’ll have a better  measuring stick to assess how you did in 2009.  Then when the economy does pick up, you’ll be more poised to do better than you would have done otherwise. 

Will It Be a "Happy" New Year for You?

Over the last week, you’ve probably had some time to reflect on 2008.   Was it a good year? That depends how you look at it.

If you measure a year by things such as the money you lost or how secure you feel about your business, then for many, it was probably a very bad year. Immersing yourself in mourning the losses will do little to improve your ability to work well or bring you happiness.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy. But science tells us that human beings are very poor predictors of what will bring them happiness.   If we really want to be happy, then it is important that we live consistent with what truly brings happiness.

One of the truths that will bring happiness is living according to who you want to become.  This is called your “ideal self.”

The “ideal self” should not be confused with the “ought self”. The “ought self” is the self that other influential people in your life wanted you to become.  For example, your parents may have had strong opinions on what you should do with your life. 

The “ideal self” is also commonly confused with the “ false ideal self.”  The “false ideal self” focuses on false ideals such as acquiring wealth, fame, or security. 

At your core, somewhere, no matter who you are, you have an idea of what kind of person you want to become. And the more you fight against this longing, the more miserable you’ll be.

It’s my belief that this “ideal self” is the self you were created to be. Some fight it more than others.  But that “ideal self” is a self that lives by personal and universal values that guide every action.

Research of happy people tells us that they live by their values. They are in less internal conflict about what is important to them.

In my next article, I’ll outline a simple process for identifying your “ideal self” and give you some guidelines on living by the values you’ve identified.