Yesterday, I pointed out that sharing too much in your social networks (quantity) is annoying to those who interact with you online. It is a good way to get relegated to the spam box or simply turned off. It is better to thoughtfully select the things you share (quality), and post less often.
The risk of taking this approach is that you may come across as shallow or having an agenda that is self-serving. Having a clear focus can produce its own set of casualties. This is the classic problem with politics, advertising, marketing, branding, social media and recruiting. Is there a middle ground that is just right? I think so, and that place is called authenticity.
To help us understand authenticity, I'd like to share part of an article written by Heather Bussing. Heather is an employment and business attorney who recently wrote Does Authenticity Make My Butt Look Big? In the article, she lays out some very helpful guidelines regarding what is appropriate to share professionally in social networks:
"I’ve been listening to sessions on employment branding at the Tru London conference. The overall consensus is that companies should be more 'authentic' But what does that really mean? And how do you do it? Asking yourself if you are being authentic enough is like asking if your what you're wearing makes your butt look big. The questions are equally narcissistic and no one is going to tell you the truth. (By the way, transparency always makes your butt look big.)
To work on being more 'authentic' is to preclude the very possibility of authenticity. Authenticity is not a destination. It’s part of the sweat you work up taking a good hard run at life. There is no way to 'be' authentic. Authenticity is inherent in just being. This is because being authentic is just being yourself. If you are comfortable in your own skin, you will be authentic without trying.For some, being authentic means revealing personal information. For others, it means demonstrating their quirks and foibles to seem more human. Still others want to be clearer in their communications and say exactly what they mean. These things don’t always work, nor do they demonstrate authenticity. The whole point of authenticity is credibility. When we say someone is authentic it means that they are not fake, they are true and you can believe them. As Jean Giraudeaux once said:
'The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’ve got it made.'
But,the reverse is also true:
'A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal' - Oscar Wilde.
So the key is to be yourself but stay focused on your purpose, audience and topic. Here are some practical tips I’ve learned as a trial lawyer on where to draw the line with your genuine, sincere, authenticity:
- Avoid TMI: Too Much Information is not the same as being authentic. People don’t want to know about your medical conditions, particularly anything involving a rash or oozing. They also don’t want to know about the toilet training of your children, how you cured smelly feet or other such personal information.
- Avoid Public Heartfelt Disclosures: It absolutely works in private and is essential to close relationships. Most people are really uncomfortable with that level of disclosure with people they don’t know. So avoid public discussion in business or professional settings of the epiphanies you had in therapy, church, a personal discussion with your spouse, or any combination thereof.
- Self deprecation only works if it’s funny. Irony doesn’t come through in writing unless you are a really talented writer with room for context. Even adding an emoticon just doesn’t cut it. If you say, 'I’m such an idiot,' people will just think you’re an idiot. On the other hand, you can push the line a lot farther if it’s funny.
- Be your 'professional' self. Put things out there you would share with a new boss or colleague. If it’s someone who would get less than 70% on your Facebook How well do you know me quiz, it’s probably TMI.
- Do not post anything online out of anger, fear, after more than one drink, or after 10 pm, whichever comes first.
- Righteous indignation, no matter how passionate and heartfelt, always comes off closer to raving lunatic.
- If you are uncomfortable, you’ll never pull it off. Don’t even try to overcome it. So just be uncomfortable and move on. It will pass as soon as you let it.
The real key to communicating authentically is understanding what you are saying really well, then saying it as clearly and simply as possible. This takes a lot more work and a lot more time than knocking off a few lines at the keyboard or flying by the seat of your pants. It often requires editing, polishing, feedback and rethinking—all things that are often absent in online publishing."
Bottom line: Authenticity is both knowing what you are talking about and saying it really well. The power of social networks--as a viable recruiting and business tool--will not be realized until we learn this lesson.
Editor's Note: This article was written by Ben Hess. Ben is the Founding Partner and Managing Director of Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.
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