WorkPuzzle

What To Do When You Don't Know What To Do

One of my daily "must reads" is Michael Hyatt's blog.  His advice is typically concise and concrete.  A recent edition addressed a topic that most of us experience frequently:  What to do when we don't know what to do.  I don't know about you, but I tend to become paralyzed in these situations.  But, not anymore... With this sage advice, from this point forward, I will always have the answer.  

"Early in my career, I was the marketing director for a book publishing company. Because of my workload and the on-going pressure to produce results, I felt overwhelmed.  I was certain that it was only a matter of time before my boss discovered that I was in over my head.

This produced uncertainty.  I was afraid to act.  Instead, I worried and spent an inordinate amount of time thinking through worst-case scenarios—something I am pretty good at.

Frustrated, I went to a wise, older colleague and poured out my soul.  He listened patiently, then said something I will never forget:

'Mike, just do the next right thing.'

'That’s it?' I asked.

'Yep.  That’s it,' he replied.  'You’re over-thinking it.  Just do the next right thing.  It will be okay.'

That simple concept simultaneously gave me relief and clarity.  I have used it time and time again in moments when I have felt overwhelmed and uncertain.

Here are the three steps I take.

1. Forget about the ultimate outcome.  The truth is that I probably have less control over the outcome than I think.  I can undoubtedly influence it, but I can’t control it.  Besides, before I ever get to the final destination, many of the variables will change.  Projects and deals have a way of unfolding over time.  There will be problems—and resources—I can’t see now.
2. Instead, focus on the next right action.  Since worrying about the outcome is unproductive, I try to think about the next actions that will move the project forward.  This is far more accessible than something in the distant future.  For example, as an author, I can worry about whether or not my book will become a bestseller or I can make sure that I am fully prepped for the interview I have scheduled today.
3. And do something now!  This is key.  Something is better than nothing.  Too often, we think that we have to have clarity about how it will all turn out.  In my experience, I rarely have this.  But, as I move toward the destination, making course corrections as necessary, I experience clarity.  Therefore, it is important to get off the sidelines and into the game.

So, if you are in a situation where you feel overwhelmed and don’t know what course to take, just do the next right thing."

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

How Your Expectations Shape Your People

In the last edition, I revealed definitive research that should forever alter your approach regarding professional negotiations...from one of an aggressive--win/lose strategy, to one of positive expectation.  If you haven’t read it yet, please read it now...My hope is that it will change your view forever regarding what makes for a successful negotiation process.

How do you decide who will succeed and who will fail?  Despite the fact that some of you are convinced that you can reliably predict who will succeed and who will fail, research suggests that it might actually be your expectations that are producing the results. 

The Rosenthal Effect refers to the phenomenon in which the greater the expectations placed on people, the better they perform.  Since 1968, a number of experiments have proven that the reality of performance can be greatly influenced by the preconceived expectations of others.

In the famous first study, Robert Rosenthal told a number of teachers that they had assessed all of the incoming 5th graders with a special new instrument that was designed to identify which children were poised to experience an intellectual “growth spurt” in the upcoming academic year; they were “high potential” children.  In reality, these children were chosen at random, and there was nothing special about them at all.

By the end of the year, the majority of that group had, indeed, made the greatest strides among all the children, despite the fact that there was nothing different about those children, outside of having the highest expectations placed on them.

What did the teachers do differently with these students?  They tended to downplay obstacles, they showed more positive patience and, most importantly, they conveyed a strong confidence in their belief that these children would do well.  The children apparently picked up on this positive expectation and lived up to the challenge of achievement.

The Rosenthal Effect is a form of self-fulfilling prophecy.  In this respect, people with poor expectations internalize their negative label, and those with positive labels succeed accordingly.

We all are guilty of doing this.  We make snap judgments about people early on in our experiences with them.  When we do this, we unconsciously set the stage for failure.

This once again proves a simple, yet eternal principle:  If you want to bring out the best in people, expect the best; expect that they CAN do it...show patience, positive confidence, and a greater number of people WILL succeed.

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

How to Guarantee Improved Negotiations

In Real Estate, perhaps more than most industries, much of the work requires good negotiating skills.  Whether you are helping clients buy or sell as an agent, or recruiting an experienced agent, there are numerous opportunities to practice your skills.  Do you trust your skills?  Or, do you need to brush up on them?

The surprising news, according to researchers Anderson and Ross (Journal of Experimental Social Psychology), is that your techniques may play a considerably lesser role than you would imagine.  So, what does matter?

Before I tell you the answer, allow me to describe how Anderson and Ross set up their research:

Varda Liberman and colleagues had undergraduates negotiate with a postgraduate student (Stooge- who was told nothing of the purpose or design of the study) about the division of university funds between undergrad and post-grad students.  Half of the undergrads were told that previous negotiations had reached agreement (a positive expectation), and half were told just to "try their best" (no expectation).  The result was that all 17 of the "positive expectation" group reached an agreement, while only five out of 17 of the "no expectation" group agreed.  Also, the positive group rated the offers made to them as much more fair and were more satisfied with the outcome.

Another, much tougher experiment required Jewish Israeli Business School students to negotiate with an Arab Israeli woman over the division of funds between Israel and Palestine.  You can imagine all the pre-concieved biases that would potentially have a negative impact on this discussion.  But, again those who had their expectations set toward a positive outcome found far greater agreement (31/38 vs. 13/38), and were also happier with the outcome.

So, clearly, what we anticipate greatly influences outcome.  If you go into a negotiation believing the worst, and expecting to be taken advantage of, you're likely to be too aggressive and competitive.  Your motive is to win "the battle."  Or, on the flip side...if you are overly concerned about offending and are too passive, you might make easy concessions and likewise, not be pleased with the result.

So, why does positive expectation work?  Positive expectations breed trust and acceptance of the other person as a reasonable, rational person.  That in turn creates a baseline of legitimacy of both parties needs, and minimizes the gamesmanship.  The jockeying for the best maneuver to "win" is no longer the central goal.

Now don't get the wrong idea... It's not that it makes you blindly trust the other person.  You still retain the right to assess whether your opinions/beliefs are being considered as well.  Expectations can remain high.

The overall principle is a simple one:  Assume the best in people first, and your success will improve.  The right principles are always the eternal ones.  They aren't just the right things to do...they are what's best for everyone.

In the next edition, I'll share how this principle is vital for those who recruit, train, and mentor new agents.

Reference:  Liberman, V., Anderson, N., and Ross, L. (2010).  Achieving difficult agreements:  Effects of Positive Expectations on negotiation processes and outcomes.  Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 46 (3), 494-504 

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

Are You a River Person or a Rut Person?

By river people, I'm not talking about the guy who lives in a van down by the river (like on Saturday Night Live).  Rather, I'm referring to the type of person who keeps everyone around them hopeful and motivated to press on toward a goal, even when times get tough.  Don't confuse my use of the term with what a few self-help gurus have suggested.  I'm talking about these people in contrast to those (some by no fault of their own) who have become "rut people," or those who have been infected by the dreaded learned helplessness (LH).  (I'll explain more about LH in the next edition.)
 
Over the past 25 years of providing psychotherapy, my chief mission has been to free people from unconscious ruts that control their lives.  This isn't easy.  People rarely see how they have boxed themselves into a view of themselves and a view of the world that limits their perspective, beliefs and actions.

When a person is in a rut through learned helplessness, they limit their own movement, growth, vision and freedom to act.  They see the world in a fixed way, and try to convince everyone around them that their "rut trapped" perspective is indeed reality.  The way they lead their life unveils consistent themes, describing their own personal rut repeatedly acted out.

A person who is not stuck in a rut, flows like a river, emanating wisdom, humor, and humility, even in difficult times.  They may have a long list of things that haven't worked out, but have no regrets for their efforts.

When things are going well, economically and emotionally, it is much more difficult to differentiate the "rut people" from the "river people."  In good times, everyone can fake their way to appearing like positive, hopeful geniuses.  But when the tide goes out, you can sure see who isn't wearing a swimming suit!  In difficult times, ruts are bound to show themselves.  Even the most fluid people can be temporarily thrown into a rut in these extreme circumstances, simply because life isn't familiar or secure.

Losing a job, a home, and plans for the future can certainly appear as an insurmountable rut.  "River people" however, don't allow themselves to get stuck there.  They manage to continually pull themselves up and out of the rut, dust themselves off, and move on with life.  I feel fortunate to know many river people and they are always refreshing and encouraging to be around.  They are the Salt and Light of our world.

As leaders, you owe it to yourself and those you coach to be this Salt and Light for your organization, to give people hope.  Whether you're coaching agents or interviewing new candidates, help people find hope and envision the opportunities that can unfold if they exercise the "formula for confidence."  Help them realize their freedom and potential through new ideas, new innovations, new training, new commitments, new values, and perhaps even an entirely new direction.

You'll find that everyone within an organization benefits once every single individual tributaries finds their "flow," and can contribute their full potential once again.  It's not only practical to encourage this hope, it's the right thing to do.

But, change is difficult - Even the most healthy, rational people tend to avoid change, preferring instead the security and safety of what is known.  Ironically however, change can produce incredible growth, if responded to effectively.  If you're interviewing new candidates without both empathy around change, PLUS the encouragement to change, you're missing an incredibly useful and helpful tool.

Have candidates answer this question:  When have you experienced the most growth in your life?  For most people the answer is when they were undergoing tremendous change, accompanied by uncertainty...perhaps when they were much younger.

It's normal to risk more when we're younger, because we don't have that much to lose. If you analyze that statement, you will begin to see the problem:  Security and hanging onto what we've acquired becomes paramount for most of us when we're older.  We cling to it and cherish it, without ever reflecting on its inherent value to our well-being.

Of course it's irresponsible to take foolish risks.  But, you can also make the argument that it is foolish to follow a course of action simply because it offers the illusion of security.

In the next edition, I'll describe the concept of Learned Helplessness, so that you can better understand how people get stuck in ruts, and how you can help them out...

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

The Spark of Greatness in Everyone: Part 2

As I mentioned earlier this week, I spend roughly half of my work life practicing as a Clinical Psychologist (my first love, really).  I enjoy that, on occasion, I get a new and inspiring glimpse into the resiliency and brilliance of the human condition...I love seeing undiscovered treasures that are hidden within each of us, begin to surface.
 
I went into some detail about one of my clients who is a very successful businessman, and who was also, unfortunately, exposed to many years of significant and continuous childhood trauma.  I described how his sanity remained intact due to the fact that he had a very special gift...a gift of being able to boil complex business problems down into simple, core solutions.  He took solace in his goal to see this gift used for good in the world.

I had also mentioned that because of his gift, he was drawn to find others who were compelled to exercise their gifts in the world and "find ways to do what others think is impossible."  He was motivated to recognize gifts in others and developed some fundamental beliefs about people.  To recap, here are three of his beliefs that I mentioned last time:

1. There is a Spark of Greatness in everyone...
2. Very few leaders are looking to find or develop that spark...
3. And, if they are, they never know when they'll run into someone with a special gift to match the needs of their organization.

I also asked these questions of managers:

1. Do you look for that Spark of Greatness in others?
2. And, when you find it-- Do you look to develop it?
3. Do you make snap judgements that may lead you to miss potential talent?

I asked my client, "How do you interview to find people who want to develop to their full potential?"

He replied:

"The questions I ask help me figure out whether a person wants to be developed to their fullest.  I ask questions that get at whether they can see the difference between bosses who did this previously (mentored them to be their best), and those who didn't, and what their response was to each of them.  If they can't resonate with the power of tapping their strengths for the good of the organization and for their own satisfaction, I seriously doubt their ability to find their own spark and attempt the impossible."

He goes onto say:

“I have a firm belief that anyone who is willing to ride out market highs and lows, ups and downs...and be satisfied, isn’t the type of individual who will achieve something special.  Instead, I believe it is possible and preferable to be surrounded by people who want to exceed market expectations.”

As I think about his comments, what comes to me is this:  You need to be looking for people who hunger for Autonomy (a healthy need to be self-directed), for Mastery (a desire to tackle new learning and new goals), and for Purpose (a higher principle that will fuel their motivation).

Conversely, I asked him what he would recommend to those savvy candidates looking for jobs...What should they ask their prospective managers in order to successfully detect those who want to develop people well?  He offered this:

"Candidates should ask a hiring manager, 'What in your career are you most proud of?'  The next questions would be, 'Is there an employee (agent) you've worked with that you are most proud of?  Why?  Tell me about the situation?  How is your relationship now?  Could I talk with that person?'"

Another line of questioning would seek to uncover how many and what types of people have followed the leader.  Good leaders bring their teams with them as they move from company to company.  My client explains:

"Ask the hiring manager, 'How many people work for you now, who worked for you in the past?  Why did they follow you?  Who, if you had a spot, would you recruit right now?  Why?'  People who naturally think this way will have a bunch of stories off the top of their heads."

How would you, as a manager, answer these questions?  Would the most savvy candidates be attracted to you?  Would you have powerful and numerous examples of bringing out the best in people?  As an owner of a company, how many of your managers would fare well with the most skilled, less desperate candidates?

My guess is that many of you continue to interview as if you only expect the most desperate and time-wasting candidates to request an interview.  If that is your default recruiting mindset, then your system of recruiting agents is terribly broken, and you will miss out on the best and the brightest....because the best and the brightest are watching you.  You will, by the very nature of recruiting well, have to go through many duds to get to the stars -- And the stars don't respond well to arrogance.  Let me be clear:  The very best candidates will detect disrespect a mile away...and possibly, before the interview ever begins.

Sure, it takes enormous amounts of your effort and energy to make these discoveries, but so does mining for gold or sifting for diamonds...

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

The Spark of Greatness in Everyone

As many of you know, I spend about half of my work life practicing as a Clinical Psychologist.  This is not only my first love, professionally, but it occasionally gives me new and inspiring glimpses into the resiliency and brilliance of the human condition, and allows me to uncover some of the undiscovered treasures that are hidden within each of us. 

One of my clients is a very successful businessman, who was also, unfortunately, exposed to many years of significant and continuous childhood trauma.  No one under those circumstances escapes unscathed, and many get stuck in a world full of hopelessness.  What kept him going?

It turns out that he was one of the few people who, on his own and by the grace of God, became aware that he possessed a very special gift.  The gift first began to reveal itself when he was just eight years old -- At this young age, he was compelled to read almost anything he could get his hands on, if it had to do with great wars and leaders of the past.  He was especially enamored by leaders who could see things (solutions) that no one else could see, and through that "seeing" could convince others to attempt "the impossible."

This special interest, he would learn, didn't exist in a vacuum or appear out of the blue.  To the contrary, he began to see that the very existence of the interest in reading (what most of us would ignore) was because it was an extension and sign of his gift.  It was later, in his work life as an adolescent, that he began to see clearly that he had a knack for finding efficiencies that no one else could see, and implementing the changes necessary, much to the amazement of his employers.  And even later in college, graduate school, and beyond...he clearly grasped that he had a knack for boiling complicated political, financial, or business ideas and images down to single page descriptions that would get to the heart of the business solution that seemed to elude everyone else.

Because of this gift and his history, both at home and in business, he has developed many foundational ideas that have successfully guided his hiring and his expectations of others.  Here are just three of his beliefs:

1. There is a Spark of Greatness in everyone...
2. Very few leaders are looking to find or develop that spark...
3. And, if they are, they never know when they'll run into someone with that special gift to match the needs of their organization.

If you are a manager of people, ask yourself these questions:

1. Do you look for that Spark of Greatness in others?
2. And when you find it-- Do you look to develop it?
3. Do you make snap judgements that may lead you to miss potential talent?

In the next issue, I'll further this discussion with comments (as described by this client) regarding how to interview in a way that uncovers people who want to develop their talents, and how to elicit those cross interview questions that I'm hoping agents will be asking you.

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

How to spot a Narcissistic Agent...and how they can poison your company

I have probably had more people ask me about narcissism than any other disorder in the Diagnostic Manual of Mental Disorders.  This doesn’t surprise me.  Unlike most other disorders, narcissistic individuals can be very successful, and almost always very charming (when they want to be).

Most questions about this topic come out of pure curiosity, but some inquiries about narcissism come from executives raising concerns over a common dilemma: "This successful person (client, agent, other executive etc) is causing me constant headaches!" 

In lay terms, "narcissism" means an almost total self-absorbtion. These individuals are focused on getting a continual stream of adulation on the one hand, and exhibit a complete lack of emotional vulnerability on the other.  Narcissistic individuals can appear very charming superficially, and are often times (but not always) the life of the party.

The primary focus for them is to be "perfect" in every way in order to be above criticism or critique of any kind.  They don't seek out any depth or attachment in relationships.  Their egos are extremely fragile and to protect themselves, they devalue any input that may reveal flaws.

After seven years of successful therapy with one particular man who had this condition, he told me that he remembers a cheerleader in high school telling him (the star football player), "You are the most conceited person I have ever known," to which he replied: "Conceited?  Me?  No!  Conceit is a flaw; I have no flaws!"

Unfortunately, when untreated, these individuals can ruin the overall reputation and character of a company or office.  Narcissists can behave in ways that may lead other agents to want to sever ties and leave a company to get away from the arrogance. They tend to increase conflict, and lead to political and counterproductive office competition.  Narcissists are likely to withhold information that could benefit everyone, including your customers, in order to get their needs met primarily.

So, regardless of how much market share a narcissist brings to your office, you need to seriously weigh the hidden costs:  How do they impact morale?  How many consumers do they turn off on their way to getting deals done?  How do they represent your company?  Do they act with the values that your company stands for?
 
I’m hesitant to give you a symptom list for Narcissists, but I will offer you just a few tips to consider when coaching, assessing, and training your agents to succeed in their attitudes towards others (From Bob Sutton's "17 things I Believe"):

• One of the best tests of a person's character is how he or she treats those with less power.  Train your agents to treat everyone equally. 
• Most agents are either novices or experts:  Encourage your experts to seek-out novices to help; and your novices to seek out experts whom they can learn from. 
• Encourage good questions rather than encouraging smart answers. 
• Find people who err on the side of optimism and positive energy with others. 
• Avoid pompous jerks whenever possible.  They not only make you feel bad about yourself, chances are that everyone in your office will eventually start acting like them.    

 

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

Coaching For Confidence...Revisited

A few years back, I wrote a blog with the above title that became one of our most popular blog entries.  I reviewed it recently in order to address a manager's concern, and realized that a revisit to this important topic may be due.  Some of the information below is from the original blog, but included are new thoughts garnered along the way...

It's no secret that managing and coaching those around us can feel futile if those being coached lack confidence in their ability to succeed.  We've all witnessed talented people lose their spark and confidence, begin to wilt, and eventually begin to drop below performance standards.  Most of the time it feels like we can’t predict who will go which way.  And sometimes we can’t.  But, here are some clues and suggestions...
 
At the time I wrote the article, in 2009, I was watching "American Idol" (OK, I admitted I watched it- and still do) when one of the judges, Simon, who happened to be pretty candid and generally correct, asked a contestant, "Do you think that you can win this?"  Her answer, or lack thereof, proved that she clearly had serious doubts as to whether she could!  And you can guess what happened.  She was soon voted off the show.

Psychologist, Rosabeth Moss Kanter, expert on the subject of confidence explains:

"Confidence consists of positive expectations for favorable outcomes.  Confidence influences the willingness to invest - to commit money, time, reputation, emotional energy, or other resources - or to withhold or hedge investment.  This investment, or its absence, shapes the ability to perform.  In that sense, confidence lies at the heart of civilization.  Everything about an economy, a society, an organization, or a team depend on it.  Every step we take, every investment we make, is based on whether we feel we can count on ourselves and others to accomplish what has been promised.  Confidence determines whether our steps – individually or collectivity – are tiny and tentative or big and bold."  (Rosabeth Moss Kanter, Confidence: Leadership and the Psychology of Turnarounds, 2004)

Recruiting people is only the first stage of an ongoing process.  It's your job as a coach, manager, and/or mentor, to bring out the best in others, and that begins with assessing their confidence.  They have to believe that they can succeed in order to succeed.

This past weekend I caught the last two holes of the British Open.  I witnessed Darren Clarke, the least likely person to win the trophy, do it three strokes ahead of the runners up.  What struck me as I watched him on and off throughout various news stories the entire weekend, is that it appeared like he expected to win all along.

After the win, a commentator said that Clarke had consulted with his sports psychologist before the Open, who told him: “Don’t let your golf game determine your attitude, let your attitude determine your golf game.” 
 
So...what do you do if your agents begin to "lose," or rarely show a sense of confidence?

1. Ask them: "Do you believe that you will succeed?"  If they don't, or if they say yes in a tentative or not believable manner:
2. Then ask them what they believe the outcome will be if they don't really believe they can achieve their goals?  (Even though my graduate courses were over 25 years ago, I can tell you that those who believed they would finish and succeed, did!  Those who didn't have that confidence, failed!)
3. Once you have them talking openly about their uncertainty and its impact on their performance, ask them to remember a time when they did succeed - big time!  Get them to remember their attitude going into the situation.  What was their level of confidence?  Did they expect success?  How did they envision success?
4. And lastly, remind them that their best confidence comes when they aren't taking on important tasks and projects to bolster their ego, rather when they are doing it to contribute to clients, co-workers and society at large.  Only under these conditions can one sustain great performance.  Because when things don't go well, it's not about your ego, it's about your contribution!

And remind them…“Don’t let your sales so far this year determine your attitude, let your attitude determine your sales the remainder of the year!”

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

The Benefits of Discipline and Consistency

Do you hold yourself and your team to practicing discipline and consistency with regard to daily tasks?  Or, do you operate your work life passively and in a reactive manner, responding to whatever is thrown in front of you?  Over the last couple weeks, I have had reason to reflect on this question for myself, our company, and my marriage.

This reflection began when I read a blog titled "Why I Hope to Die Empty," by Todd Henry.  It got me thinking about the importance of not wasting our days on frivolous undertakings, but instead making use of our talents consistently and completely, until the day we die.

My initial reaction was one of exhaustion.  To many of us, this call to "empty ourselves," can sound like we're being asked to run a marathon, plus wind sprints, every day without any rest.  That sounds hard, doesn't it?  As a result, I attempted to ignore the content of this blog at first, however, it continued to relentlessly pester me.  I had several interactions throughout the last few weeks that forced me to consider this concept again and again.  The final straw came when the pastor of our church preached on the "Parable of the Ten Minas."  This parable centers around the importance of using our talents and resources for purposeful and responsible growth.

At that point, I realized that I could no longer ignore this important message.  I began to consider, once again, how I could be graded along the continuum when it comes to using my talents and resources well.  As usual, there were places I could be graded well, and other places...not so well.  However, what fascinated me much more than the tally of pluses and minuses were the reasons for my successes.  I demonstrated tremendous growth where my talents and resources were well invested.

As it turns out, and only upon weeks of reflection,  I realized that the  "A grades" in my life have not come from the home runs, the one time discoveries, or any presentation I've ever delivered.  Instead, they've consistently shown up as a result of getting on base every day...the bunts, the bloopers, and the infield singles.  Whether it has been in my education, my marriage, therapy with my patients, writing the blog, executing our business well, or interacting with others -- it's the small proactive activities, executed with discipline and consistency that have produced almost all of the growth in myself and others involved in those tasks.  Each activity, each day, in and of itself, never felt like I was doing anything that spectacular.  Most of it felt rather mundane and ho-hum.

I don't want you to get the idea that I have done anything heroic at all...or that I haven't made plenty of mistakes or wasted precious resources of talent, treasure, and time.  I have!  But, I'm beginning to see that the ho-hum, do-the-right-thing, plan-and-execute-tasks-proactively lifestyle... IS Heroic.  In looking at what has driven the truest, most sustainable impact, it's only been through years of doing what seems like the "mundane" right thing, that the lives of patients have changed, neighbors have confided in me, young couples have been mentored, companies have trusted us, and friendships have been built.

Not all of the above activities came with great willingness on my part either.  Ben Hess (Business Partner and Managing Director of Tidemark, and now friend) ultimately had to convince me that jointly writing this blog twice weekly, would be time well spent for, not only our business partners, but for us and our own learning.  I resisted, thinking that it would be time we could be spending on other tasks (this is called lazy).  Ben couldn't have been more accurate in his recommendation.

So I urge you to ask your self these questions:

"What small steps am I taking consistently and proactively that have an impact on the growth of my business, the business of others, and the lives of others?"

"Am I spending the majority of my life reacting to circumstances of business and life without consistent, disciplined action?"  If so, "What talents am I ignoring by doing that?"

"What proactive tasks can I add to my schedule that will SLOWLY add value to the business, others, and my own learning?"

"What tasks are already right under my nose- right now- that I am actively avoiding?"

This should keep you busy for awhile...

 

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.

Waiting for Superman: Reinforces Principles of Management and Sales

If you haven’t already seen it, I want to highly recommend you watch the critically acclaimed documentary called Waiting for Superman.  Directed by Davis Guggenheim, Waiting for Superman, received the Audience Award for Best Documentary at the 2010 Sundance Film Festival, as well as Best Documentary Feature at the Critics’ Choice Movie Awards.

Documentary filmmaker, Davis Guggenheim, explores the tragic ways in which the American public education system is failing our nation's children, and explores the principle differences between “dropout factory” public schools and some charter schools, many of which are in some of the worst neighborhoods.

On the public school side, dreadful statistics are presented in a series of animated episodes. He chronicles decades of diminishing national reading and math scores, America’s low standing when compared with other countries, the high dropout rate in urban public high schools, the tenure system (guaranteed by union contract), and the fact that it is against union rules to pay excellent teachers a higher wage than inferior ones.  Apparently, many public school principals rotate lousy teachers within a district, in pessimistic shuffles known as the Dance of the Lemons, the Turkey Trot, and Pass the Trash.

On the flip side, despite receiving public funds (as well as much private support), charter schools can hire non-union teachers and adopt their own curriculum and standards.  In these environments, they can hire and fire at will, reward good teaching, hold longer school days, and exercise high expectations.  What a concept!

What does this have to do with real estate?

I did some additional research and came upon an article, by Ellen Galinsky, who had personally spent time interviewing some of the best education innovators.  In this article, you will readily find principles that relate to the best managers and agents in real estate.  Here is some of what she has to say:

“About a year ago, I spent time interviewing and filming Geoffrey Canada and his staff at the Harlem Children’s Zone (HCZ) for Mind in the Making.  Since Canada is one of the 'stars' of Waiting for Superman (as he deserves to be), I feel compelled to share my observations from that visit as a brief glimpse of what it will take to fix education.

 

To foster good teaching—it takes an adult learning environment where there is accountability: When I visited the HCZ, Canada told me that they look for teachers with a 'no excuses' attitude:  Everybody who comes in to work for me promises me they know these kids are poor and the families have problems.  However, Canada finds that if a teacher isn’t doing well, he or she is likely to begin blaming the difficulties in these children's home lives.  Canada says to these teachers:

'You knew [the realities of these children’s lives] when you took the job—you said you understood that was the deal—now you’re making excuses.'  If you allow people to make excuses, it becomes the kid’s fault, the parent’s fault, the community’s fault...versus those of us who are getting paid!  That said, the teachers at HCZ have a great deal of support for improving, including opportunities to learn more about children’s learning and teaching from other more experienced teachers, from specialists, and from colleges and universities which they are encouraged to attend.  I had the strong impression that HCZ was a learning community, where everyone, at every level, including Canada, was trying to learn more.  And that learning environment has become contagious, spilling over onto the children.

To foster good learning environments for the children, there needs to be high expectations and accountability, but mistakes are seen as part of the process of learning.  In its brochure, Canada describes the ultimate goal of HCZ: 'getting our kids into and through college.'  HCZ makes sure that this goal is visible and reinforced daily.  For example, in the Promise Academy elementary program I observed, the children line up in the hallway every morning and state this goal as their creed.  Canada says:
 If kids are saying their creed, 'I will go to college; I will succeed,'
if their parents are thinking that, if the teachers are thinking that, then you’ve got thirty percent of the work done.  In the HCZ, the children are expected to develop a good work ethic, put many hours into school, and to understand that there are times when learning won’t be fun.  The staff also know that it is impossible for children to succeed all of the time, which is why I like the rating system used there—not A, B, C, D, and F but 1 to 4, where 1 is an 'oops.'  The superintendent of HCZ, Daryl Rock describes their philosophy:  We give [children] the freedom to make mistakes.  We teach our kids that failure is not a way of labeling who you are—it’s just a way of identifying what you don’t know and what you need to put more effort into.  When kids understand that, they’re not hesitant about trying something, because if they fail, it’s not a reflection on them.  That just tells them:  'This is an area we need to work on.'  To put this in another way, the children aren’t just learning content, they are learning life skills, including how to take on challenges.”

Which attitudes are you and your company adopting toward productivity?
 
Furthermore, if you’ve been searching for a worthy cause for individual volunteering or better yet, to rally your office/company around, you might want to visit the Waiting for Superman website for action opportunities.  This could be what you’ve been waiting for...

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Editor's Note: This article was written by Dr. David Mashburn. Dave is a Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, a Partner at Tidemark, Inc. and a regular contributor to WorkPuzzle. Comments or questions are welcome. If you're an email subscriber, reply to this WorkPuzzle email. If you read the blog directly from the web, you can click the "comments" link below.